Happy Thanksgiving

Apparently I have been busy because it's been a couple of months since I have updated my blog.  A lot of things have happened, some happy, some sad...

Since tomorrow is Thanksgiving I've been thinking about all I have to be thankful for.  A two of my friends have suffered the horrible loss of their husbands (and in one case, her husband and young son).  I can't imagine my life without Tommy and Adrian, so I am very thankful for them, the loves of my life. 

My heart and thoughts are with Cara and Pearl, Tami and Chloe and Ethan, Sherrill and the Rudas...family is everything and the loss of family is unfathomable.  My thoughts are with them this Thanksgiving as they gather with friend and family and remember those who are gone.

I'm also thankful for a lot of other stuff, aside from my immediate family:

The Real Housewives of Adams County, who provide tons of laughs and fun.

Susan, my fellow democrat, who drank with me on election night whilst we sweated the results.

Loud Mouth golf clothes, because they are bright and fun.

Rhoda, my snuggly little dog, who I adore.

Vodka...enough said.

Botox, so I don't look like such a people hater all of the time.

My nieces, Lexi and Ally, who allow me to know what it would be like to have daughters

Modern medicine, which helped Tommy with a small nervous tic problem, and made him a much happier child.  Man, I love that kid.

Modern medicine, which helps me with pesky problems like hormones and hot flashes and makes me a much happier mommy.

Vodka...oh yeah, I said that one already.  OK, I'll be specific...Flavored vodka...

Bacon

All of these little things get me though the rough times.  I couldn't do it without family, friends, and apparently booze and pills.

I love you all, enjoy the frenzy of Thanksgiving and Black Friday, and send out some good thoughts to my friends during this most difficult time of year.

Muah!

Another birthday...

I'm starting to enjoy birthdays again. After a rough time in my 30s, birthdays are fun again and something to celebrate.

Think about it...
At 5 you start kindergarten
You are a teenager at 13
Get your driver's license at 16
Vote at 18
Woohoo drink legally at 21
Car insurance goes down at 25--unless you are me and crash a lot and get your car stolen a couple of times

It's pretty much down hill from there. No birthday milestones, you just get older and saggier and if you are still single turning 30 is like a scarlet letter. But lots of good stuff happened in my 30's, I got married (whew) and had a baby and kind of came into my own.

When I turned 40 I embraced it. No dreading of birthdays and celebrating with friends. So tomorrow I turn another year older and have 4 days of fun and celebration planned.

Below are some pictures of birthdays past:

My original BIRTH day

 

First birthday, check out the jazzy high chair

 

Second Birthday, same jazzy high chair

 

Third birthday, that is a Lemon Torte from Vollmers, and those are my dad's sideburns. 

 

Another birthday, Raggedy Ann cake (a recurring theme)

 

Probably a Raggedy Ann cake, check out the pink clogs.  My love of clogs exists today.

 

Another Raggedy Ann cake

 

Birthday in first grade, Julie Jamison, do you see yourself?

 

Who remembers birthday parties at McDonalds, dang that was good cake

 

Hot pink leisure suit!  That's Shari Sword for those who went to Central

Another Raggedy Ann cake

 

Not a Raggedy Ann cake

 

Thank God someone stopped taking pictures of me with cake.  Or, this is the last one I could find.  Check out those blue daisy dishes!!

 

So while I am pretty sure I won't have a Raggedy Ann birthday cake tomorrow, I will have a fun filled weekend with my hubby and son, good friends and family.  Happy birthday to me!!!!

We are raising a proud little Democrat

It is not a secret in our house as to which side of the political fence we sit.  Adrian and I talk about politics, watch politics on TV, etc.  Four years ago we sent Tommy to pre-school in a t-shirt that said "Obama Bama Bo Bama" on it, I thought it was awesome.  One of our friends (Russ, that would be you) was not amused.   That's just how we roll.

We don't have a shirt for him for this election, but if he gets one it will be because Tommy wants one, not me airing my political views through my child.

Anyway, the other day we were in the car and the conversation went like this:

T:  Mom, that car has a Romney bumper sticker on it
Me:  Yep, it sure does
T:  I don't like Mitt Romney
Me:  Why not?
T:  Mitt Romney tells lies. 
Me:  Where did you here that:
T:  On the TV.

OK, one, are the politicians now advertising on Disney XD because that's about all he watches, and two, I didn't know he was that observant.

Me:  Well, even though I don't particularly like Mitt Romney you can't believe everything you see on TV.  Those commercials can be deceptive.
T:  Mom!  Romney is a 'publican and 'publicans TELL LIES!

At this point I am not going to argue, the kid would argue over the color of the sky, so I am trying to steer the conversation elsewhere.

T:  Mom!  Did you hear me?  'publicans tell lies.  Brayden says that Obama is a liar and I told him that the 'publicans are liars and we got in an argument about it (Yes, Tia, if you are reading this, Tommy was talking with your Brayden).
Me:  Tommy, it's not appropriate to discuss politics at summer camp.  People lose friends arguing over politics.
T:  But MOM!  Brayden and I argue about everything!

It's going to be a long run-up to the election.  I hope I don't get any calls from angry parents!

Open letter to the creep who stole my debit card number

You are a King Jackhole.  Seriously get off of your ass and get a job that earns you your own money so you don't have to steal from hard working people like me.  I hope you get caught and go to prison where you will become some bad man's (or woman's) bitch.

Thanks to you I now have no debit card.  It's a good thing my husband watches every transaction that goes through our bank account like a hawk.  Normally an iTunes charge wouldn't raise suspicion, however a $21.98 purchase did.  Dude, what did you buy?  I'm guessing an app on how not to be a jackass...

Meanwhile I had to call the bank, also known as India, to speak to someone named "Frank" who sounds more like Apu from the Simpsons.  Frank tells me to contact iTunes, which I have just told him I already did and that they are the ones who said the card was used fraudulently.  He is not understanding, I do the stupid American thing and just talk louder, since volume makes things easier to understand.  Finally he gets it and sends through the claim and cancels my card.  Tells me I'll have a new card in 10 business days.  He has obviously never met me and doesn't know that my debit card is my lifeline.  He then offers to expedite it and I'll have it in 3 days.  OK dude, why the frick didn't you just offer that to me in the first place????

Adrian is loving that I have no debit card.  No debit card = no spending.  I had to use his card to get gas the other night, beg $7 off of him to buy lunch the other day, lucky for me there was a BBQ at work today so I didn't need any money.  It's like not having one of my arms, the only thing worse would be to have my iPhone taken away from me.

You identity thieves and credit card stealers really are the scum of the earth.  Someday there will be a way to find you and you are going to get yours.  Your new cellmate Butch will make sure of it.

Bravo TV ain't got nothin' on the Real Housewives of Adams County

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Things not to do or say to a really hormonal menopausal woman

Here is some backstory. Because I'm so young (ha ha) my doctor won't put me on full on HRT. Apparently it causes bad Osteoperosis and I really don't want to be Hunchback Heidi in my later years. Instead I take regular old birth control pills but back to back for three months and then I stop for a week. I call that HELL WEEK.

Hell week is bad for everyone. Me, my husband, my child, coworkers, friends, mail man, checkout person at Hobby Lobby, you get the picture. It's like a demon has invaded my body for a solid 7 days.

Until you live this yourself you have no idea how horrid it can be. I have a week long headache, I think nasty thoughts, I snarl, I drink vodka. Hell week has varying degrees of hellishness and this past week was a doozy. While I wallowed in my misery I compiled a list of things that really set me off this week and I'd like to share them with you.

1. When a HG (Hormonal Gal) states that she's literally crazy without her hormones don't reply "really there isn't much difference when you take them and when you don't" and then say it was a joke.

2. Do not rip open the bag of English muffins leaving a hole in the package. You are not a caveman. Open and close the bag in the appropriate manner.

3. Do not call your mom "mother of the year" when you don't get your way.

4. Do not insinuate that I am not a team player.

5. Do not hide the Midol.

6. Do not pull a bait and switch.

7. Do not ignore my texts and phone calls.

8. Do not hide the chocolate.

9. When I ask for multi-seed Crunch Master crackers in a yellow box do not bring home focking Ritz crackers in a red box.

And for the love of all that is holy DO NOT ASK ME WHY I AM CRYING. I don't usually know why and don't have an answer. So do us a favor and don't ask.

That pretty much sums it up. I know it sounds like my hubby said some wrong things this week but I spend more time with him than anyone so he had more opportunity. He also did some really nice things and tried to make me feel better so he does get let off the hook a bit!

Today is a new day and the start of my hormones and I already feel like a new person. I'm good for another 3 months but then...watch out.

Things that keep me up at night volume 2

Why do they make bathroom stalls where the door opens to the inside? I'll admit, I'm larger than the average gal, however even the skinniest of skinny chicks have to have a problem with this as well.

We were at Tommy's basketball game the other day which is at a middle school. I used the facilities on the way out and literally had to squish myself between the wall and commode to get the door of the stall open when I was done. It was all I could do to get me and my purse out of that stall without major incident. I realize this was a middle school and kids are smaller but don't they have teachers there? Maybe some large teachers. How do they get out?

Same problem at the airport, all the stall doors open to the inside of the stall. What makes it worse is you have to haul your things like carry on bags into the stall with you. Getting you and your baggage out of there is nearly impossible. I usually try for the handicap stall so that I have plenty-o-room. This is problematic in that usually someone who NEEDS that big stall is kept waiting.

So potty designers of the world take note. We are tired of your stall door games. Doors should open to the outside thankyouverymuch.

My other issue is cloth napkins. It never fails that I have on black pants when given a white linen napkin or light colored pants when given a black linen napkin. Either way I usually have napkin remnants on my lap for the rest of the day. There must be some solution to this problem. Miracle napkins? If they can make a perfect brownie pan (that is anything BUT perfect) or knives that never need sharpened, how about some linen napkins that don't shed?

Seems to me that people make things more difficult than need be. That is all.