Electric Vehicle pros and cons

In May, after we got a really bad hail storm in Lakewood, I ended up buying a Nissan Leaf.  This is a 100% electric vehicle.  No gas.  No oil.  No rev or RPMs.  The only thing you put in this car is windshield wiper fluid, brake fluid and steering column fluid.  That's it.

This car is super fast and fun to drive.  My new favorite thing is to pull up next to a sports car at a red light and leave it in my dust when the light turns green.  If you think you have a car that can beat mine, let's set up a race!

I plug it in every other night or so, I can go 125-ish miles on one charge.  That's back and forth to work 2 days plus a few errands.  I recently calculated that the home electric bill went up about $15 a month.  People...that is less than a tank of gas was costing.  I'm saving over a hundred dollars a month in gas!

Because I have a good charger at home I don't have to rely on public charging stations very often.  When I do have to charge away from home there is usually some non-electric driving jerk who is parked in  the charging station parking space.  Those of us in the electric vehicle (EV) world refer to these people as ICE Holes.  Internal Combustible Engine, aka gas powered vehicles.  The charging infrastructure is growing but there are still limited places for us to charge our cars.  When we pull up to charge and there is a non EV parked there it is infuriating.

This happened to me yesterday and last week at the Whole Foods in Belmar.  There is a parking garage for the store and other businesses in the area.  The charging stations are close to where the office building doors are and the last two times some ICE Hole has been parked in one of those spaces.  Spaces that are clearly marked and painted bright green.  It's a parking garage!  There are hundreds of spaces, and in fact, the space directly across from the EV spot was empty!  Because the other charging spot was in use I had to get creative.

I drove around to the empty space and luckily the cable was long enough to reach my car so I could still plug in and charge.  Because this was the second time in two weeks I was furious.  Why are people so inconsiderate?  Would they park in a clearly marked handicapped spot?  Generally people are respectful and leave those spots for people who need them.

Last week the ICE Hole came out and got in her car and drove away as I was setting up to charge on the other side of the charging station.  I gave her a dirty look and that was it.

Now it's happened twice and I was pissed.  I stomped around.  I wanted to leave a nasty note.  I had no paper.  I rummaged through my purse and found the school supply list we used last weekend.  I ripped off a section and gave them a piece of my mind.

Then I stomped into Whole Foods to get my lunch.  I worried the whole time that the ICE Hole would key my car.  Would they know it was the EV across the way, the EV charging next to them, or someone totally different who just left the note and didn't charge.  Oh geez, what have I done?

I finished my lunch, went out to my car.  ICE Hole was gone.  My car was intact.  I had gained 8 miles in that 45 minute charging session.  All is well that ends well but next time, maybe I'll park directly behind the ICE Hole, pinning them in, and hook up the charger and leave.  See how they like that.

People, please don't park in the green EV spots unless you drive an EV.  Think about it this way, your car is on fumes, you pull into the gas station and there is an 18-wheeler at every pump, just parked, no driver in sight.  You wouldn't be able to fill up and you wouldn't be very happy about it.  Yesterday could have been an emergency, if I couldn't charge I may not have been able to get home.  Think twice before parking, if you wouldn't park in a blue space designated for ADA then don't park in a green space either.

If you are in the market for a new vehicle, I highly recommend going electric.  Lots of auto companies offer electric options so you can drive and compare.  Huge tax benefits, huge savings on gas and you get to drive a fun car.

My grandma is turning 100 years old this week.

Grandma Karrie was born in Kansas on July 28, 1917, right in the midst of WW1.  Her family was originally from Germany and at some point her father had done something iffy and they moved to the Volga region of Russia, now commonly known as Sochi, where the Winter Olympics were held in 2014.

Eventually her family made it to the United States and settled east of Greeley by way of Kansas.  When Grandma was young her mother died leaving her father with 8 kids.  So what did he do?  He went and married a woman with 8 kids of her own.  Of those 16 children, Grandma is the only one left.  I remember her telling stories about the family having to prepare meals twice each day because they didn't have enough pots, pans and dishes to feed everyone at once.

Grandma met her husband Jake and they got married and had 3 children of their own.  Betty, Jerry and Tommy.  They lived out on a farm and my dad used to tell stories about gathering the eggs and Uncle Jerry locking him in the hen house.  He also told stories about the mean turkey that would chase him around.

Some of the stories I remember him telling were about how much fun Grandma and Grandpa Jake used to have with their friends.  Grandma would laugh so hard telling stories from the past that tears would be rolling down her cheeks.

Mostly the stories I remember are about how tough Grandma was.  Growing up with 15 siblings isn't easy and there were always chores and work to be done.  Even when she was married the hard work didn't end.  She'd go out and kill a chicken for lunch to feed the workers on the farm.  During WW2 there were German prisoners of war held near Greeley.  Those POWs would work the nearby farms and people like my Grandma and her neighbors would cook enormous amounts of food to keep them fed.  Many of those POWs stayed around after the war and married some of the young women they met working on those farms.

When Grandpa Jake got sick they sold the farm and moved to town where Grandma nursed her husband until his death.

I don't know a lot about what happened after that but at some point she met Hank, who we called Poppie.  Grandma worked retail at the downtown Fashion Bar and then later at the Weld County Health Department.

Grandma and Poppie lived in various houses around Greeley but the one I remember most was south of Toddy's.  It had an apple tree and grandma was always making pies and apple sauce and apple butter with the apples from the tree.  Pretty much most Sundays we would end up at Grandma and Poppie's house for pie (she made peach too!).  Other times she would let us know that on Sunday she would be making "blina" which were these really thick, yeasty pancakes and were delicious.  It was a revolving door on Sunday mornings, Aunt Betty would be there with Renae and Amy, we would show up and my other cousins Tanya, Jeff and Jimmy would sometimes come over as well.

Grandma was the best cook.  She hosted many Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners and she and Aunt Betty and my dad would fight over the liver and other organs from the turkey--yuck.

We lost Aunt Betty and we lost Poppie.  Grandma moved to her current home and has lived there ever since.

One hundred years is a long life.  There have been 18 presidents since she was born.  She lived through two world wars, the Korean War, Vietnam and the Gulf War.  Women weren't allowed to vote when she was born.  Civil rights happened.  We had a black president.  Gay and lesbian people can get married.  Can you imagine?

The biggest thing is that technology has passed my Grandma by.  She never had a cell phone or a tablet or a computer.  She didn't have a DVR.  She didn't need those things, she lived an entire lifetime without needing them.  If she needed a recipe it was in the recipe box.  If she wanted to talk to someone she used the phone on the wall.  If she needed something at the store she drove there and bought it.

My grandma outlived two husbands and two of her three children.  She didn't always have an easy life but she has 7 grandchildren, 11 great grandchildren and one great great granddaughter who have brought her a lot of joy.  On Sunday we will all gather to celebrate 100 years of Caroline (Heberlein) Shearer and I hope it is the best day of her very long life.  Love you, Grandma!

PS:  She won't read this, remember, she doesn't have technology!

Brain Training: Twelve sessions in

Tommy completed his 12th session on Friday.  When we started this process they said we would start to see results in 10-12 sessions.  I'm not sure if the tics have decreased or not.  To me it seems like they are as present as ever.  Most of his tics are bilateral, meaning he moves both arms at the same time.  I have noticed that sometimes he only moves one arm.  Maybe that's forward progress, I don't know.

He has moved from playing games with his brain to watching movies.  Big deal, right?  Well, if his brain doesn't do what it is supposed to, the movie goes blurry and he has to slow his brain down in order for it to come back into focus.

I read a fictional book this week that hit close to home called The Perfect Son.  It was about the parents of an only child with Tourette's Syndrome.  His name was Harry and he was 17.

The mom was primarily in charge of the treatments, the visits to the psychologist, the psychiatrist, the therapist, and all of the activities he did, like vocal training.  The dad was very focused on his job and really had no idea what his son went through on a daily basis.  The mom had a heart attack and the family dynamic shifted and the dad had to be more involved in Harry's life.

The thing that struck me most was that Harry had a best friend named Max.  They had been friends for years.  Max was his best friend, his brother, his protector.  When anyone messed with Harry, Max was there for him.  When Harry's mom was sick, Max was there for him in an instant.  I know this book is fiction, but it made me think, WHY can't Tommy have a friend like Max?  He needs that, more than you can imagine.  This journey would be so much easier for him if he had a friend like that that he could always count on.

He HAS friends, but these kids are 11-12 years old.  They get frustrated with Tommy, he has impulse issues and says things before he thinks.  He gets angry easily.  He misjudges social cues.  These are all things tied to TS and kids don't get it and they distance themselves.

Middle school starts in August.  I really hope that Tommy walks into school and meets his Max. "Max" doesn't need to be perfect.  He doesn't need to be a jock, or a musical star, or the smartest or most handsome kid in school.  He just needs to be a friend that Tommy can count on through thick and thin.  Underneath the TS Tommy has a lot to offer.  He's funny and smart and caring...so "Max", if you are out there, Tommy is waiting for you.

The latest in all things People Hater

I've lost track but I think we have done 7 brain training sessions.  I had a nightmare the other night that whatever they are doing to him worked in reverse and made the Tourette's Syndrome worse and they didn't know why.  I think this stems from the fact that after every session his tics are REALLY bad.  They were really bad yesterday and even worse last night.

Tommy's struggle this summer is that his friends aren't really available during the day.  Most of them are in a summer program and the two boys up the street went out of the country until September.  Tommy didn't want to do a summer program, so he's basically doing nothing.  The first week has not been easy.

Last night he was playing with a friend and I'm not sure what happened but all hell broke loose and he came home super upset.  When the kids are messing with him (not in a mean way) he takes it wrong and flips out.  His impulse control is non-existent, and those of you who know him understand that he can get really LOUD. 

He got home and was upset and the tics were so bad it's like he was having a seizure.  I pretty much melted down while I was talking with his mom...too much going on right now and I'm feeling overwhelmed.  Adrian is working his butt off burning the candle at both ends and we are stressed.  I feel guilty because I won't be home the next 2 nights and worry about Tommy.  I feel like I'm on one of those things at the park that spins super fast and I can't get off and I want to throw up!

I guess the point of this blog is that Tourette's Syndrome just doesn't effect the person afflicted, the whole family deals with it and it is not easy. 

Since it is Tourette Syndrome awareness month until June 15, here are some facts for you:

• One in 100 people, mostly males, have Tourette's. 
• There is no cure for TS.  Yes, people can learn to control it, but it's very difficult.  Think about your nose itching and you can't scratch it.  The more it itches the more agitated you become, but you can't reach it, you can't make it stop.  That is what it's like to hold in a tic, it can be physically painful.
• About 25% of children with TS will outgrow it.
• There is no medication specifically to treat TS.  There are drugs for things like high blood pressure, heart conditions, migraines, etc. that have good results in children with tics.  For Tommy, many of these worked for awhile, but then they just stop.
• Tourette Syndrome is not just verbal tics.  Lucky for us, Tommy's tics aren't verbal.  If you ever come across someone who is making noises like throat clearing, screeching, etc. it is possible that they have TS.  Be kind, don't stare.

We are looking forward to the next couple of weeks.  Between 10 and 12 treatments we hope to start seeing positive results from the brain training, in the form of reduced anxiety and reduced tics.  Stay tuned.

Brain Training Update

We are a few weeks into brain training and Tommy has done 4 sessions.  The protocol changed and they will be focusing on the left part of his brain instead of the frontal lobe:

The last 3 sessions his leeds have been lie the photo.  He plays lots of different games using his brain, like skateboarding, boating, and carnival midway games.  I usually go into the room with him, but after looking at the screen I feel oogy, like I've been hypnotized or something!

The drive home is killing me.  We have gotten into bad traffic every single time, averaging about an hour to get home.  It's exhausting for both of us.  Immediately after treatment his tics are pretty bad, but then he falls asleep:

Poor kiddo.  Then he's super cranky for the rest of the night.  Fun times.  We are 4 treatments in and should start to see results at 10-12 treatments. 

Starting next Friday we will start going at 8am.  Tommy is not happy with the time, but on Wednesdays I can take him and then head to the office and Adrian can pick him up.  That way we get it out of the way, and I don't have to fight traffic in the evenings.

Not much of an update, sorry!

Brain Mapping and Brain Training, Session One

Last Saturday Tommy had his brain mapped.  Here he is getting comfy before they strap on the cap to read his brain:

 

I was worried because his tics were really bad that day and sure enough, as soon as they put the cap on he started having tics:

 

Things settled down and they were able to get a good reading.  He spent about 20 minutes with his eyes open and then another 20 minutes with his eyes closed.  When they read the data they take out all of the tics and eye blinks and other movements so that they have straight brain wave data.  He also had to take a test on the computer.

 

They read the data and mapped his brain and we went back yesterday for his first brain training session.  It turns out that the part of his brain that needs help is along the frontal lobe and on the left side of his brain.  They got the electrodes hooked up to his head:

 

There were 4 electrodes plus one on each ear.  He played a series of games and the technician led him through them, I think there were 6 or 7 in all.   There was a boat game and a series of Carnival Midway games:

 

 

When he did what he was supposed to, the blocks would get knocked over, or the balloons would pop, or the clown's face would fall off.  It was pretty interesting to watch.  After about 45 minutes we were finished.  His next sessions are Wednesday and Friday and we'll go twice a week for the next 10 weeks or so

 

On the way home he was tired and cranky and his tics were bad.  He didn't have them while he was playing the game but would have them in between.  The cranky/tiredness was from using a part of his brain that he doesn't use a lot, it was basically a work out for him.

 

We are also keeping a journal of his tics over the course of this treatment to see if and when they diminish.  Once they start to go away we can start weaning him off the medicine.

 

Fingers crossed that this works!





Moving forward

It's been a rough year for our family.  We lost my dad last June.  After that, our son, Tommy, had in increase in tics from his Tourette's Syndrome.  We tried different medicines and got him somewhat under control.

In December my husband had a change in career and we lost our insurance.  Tommy's tics ebbed and flowed.  The stress in our household from all of the personal and professional changes was very difficult for the grownups, and an eleven year old boy who picks up on a lot.

The new year brought new changes.  A new job for the hubby and a whole new schedule for him.  Tommy continued to struggle with the TS (Tourette's Syndrome) and it was causing problems for him in school.  It's hard to learn when you can't focus.  It's hard to be at school when kids are mean.  It's hard to learn when people are not understanding.  We hired a math tutor (we parents suck at fractions) and tried to help Tommy stay on track.

We found a new awesome doctor and have been changing up his meds.  Mostly the changes didn't work, or caused reverse behavior from what we expected.  There really is no medicine to treat TS.  There are lots of drugs out there for other things, that help kids with tics.  They range from blood pressure medicine (made him too tired), to black label drugs.  You have seen the commercials...If you took DRUGX and suffered blah blah, call 1-800-BAD-DRUG now.  He took migraine medicine and the latest one is for kids with seizures. 

He's also taking medicine for anxiety, because if the anxiety is out of control, the tics go out of control.  He had the worst side effect from the first anti-anxiety medicine and we quickly changed that drug.

The next drug she mentioned to control the tics is Haldol and there is NO WAY IN HELL I am giving that to our 11-year old son.  It scares the ever living crap out of me.  I've sort of been stumbling along since then, worrying about what comes next.  Especially since Tommy starts middle school next year.  A new school, a bunch of new kids, anxiety out the wazoo.  I'm a wreck and should maybe take the Haldol myself.

Things were feeling very bleak...until Tuesday.  My mom called and to make a long story short, a former co-worker of hers runs a neuro-therapy business.  www.evergreenneurotherapy.com and she has had some great successes with kids who have ADD, ADHD, Aspbergers, Dyslexia, Anxiety and she has also helped a child with TS.

Tuesday evening Tommy told me his tics were so bad and wasn't there something else we could try.  I told him about this new place and that I was going to look into it.  I went there on Wednesday and it seems amazing.  I've done further Internet research and read stories about it helping kids with TS.  I feel hope that I haven't felt in a long time.

Tommy and I are going there on Saturday for his brain mapping and testing and then he'll start next week, each Wednesday and Friday, to retrain his brain.  This is a big commitment for our family.  Tommy has to do his part, hubby needs to get him to my office on Wednesdays so I can take him up the mountain to Evergreen, and on Fridays (thank goodness I don't work on Fridays) I'll take him again for treatment.  I keep telling myself if medicine can't help him, then surely science will.

We should start seeing results 5-6 weeks in, but it will likely take 10 weeks.  It's pricey, but we are lucky to have family members who are helping.

I know my blog has been a source of entertainment, and then it became a black hole for months.  I'm going to use it over the coming weeks to talk about Tommy and his progress.  I can only think that we are going through this so that we can maybe help someone else someday.  Our family has experienced the downside of social media over the past several months.  There are some seriously vicious people out there.  I hope this treatment works because I'd like to reverse that karma and use social media to spread the word about neuro-therapy and how it can help kids like Tommy.

So if you are interested, stay tuned...and when we can get things turned around, I promise my old, fun blog will be back.

I'm baaaaacccccckkkkkk

I've been gone for a long while.  Losing my dad has been so difficult, and then a bunch of other crap happened over the summer, and I just didn't have the energy to be witty and write my blog.  I'm not so sure this entry will be all that witty either.

My mom, sister and I have been really struggling to get back to some state of normalcy.  I don't even know if "normal" exists anymore.  I do know that we couldn't have done it without our friends and family who love us through thick and thin.

In my experience, though, I have found out that you really find out who your true friends are when something huge happens. 

I was watching a movie on the Lifetime Movie Network last week (I'm such a deep person!) but something made me really stop and think.  The teenage girl in the movie lost her mom to murder.  Within a few months her best friend began dating her boyfriend and their excuse was basically "you have been weird and should be over this by now, you drove us together".  Pretty harsh, and while I haven't had those exact words spoken to me, I have had some friends make it pretty clear that they feel that same way, I should get over it and stop being weird.

You know what?  I'm NOT going to just get over it.  I talked to a longtime friend last night who lost her dad about a year ago and she said the first year is so hard, and that normal maybe doesn't exist anymore.  It was such a relief to hear her say that because the "friends" who aren't being very supportive have no idea.  They all still have their parents and haven't had to go through the unimaginable grief and sadness that I've been dealing with.  Trying to talk to them and make them understand doesn't work, I've tried.  In response I get "you need therapy or grief counseling or something, you should talk to someone".  Um...hello, I'm trying to talk to YOU.

I have such amazing friends who call and text to check up on me on a regular basis,  I don't know why I have been dwelling on the friends who have written me off.  Maybe they don't know what to say.  I don't need much, maybe a text just to say hi, they are thinking about me, or an email to ask how I'm doing.

So, this is a giant thank you to those who tried to make the past few months a little easier with kind words, love, friendship, and even food--Weight Watchers is happy to take my money every week as I try to lose my "grief fat".  Thank you for letting me be weird and sad without question.  Thank you for getting me and helping me through this shit show.

If you got through this and are disappointed, I promise my next blog will be about the day my dad asked me to take him to the pot store.  Stay tuned.

Observations from the Chemo Center

I'm really supposed to be working but the connection here is so sucky I thought I'd take a break, hope the Boss Lady doesn't mind.  Today is Kicking Cancer's Ass, Round 4.  After round 3 my dad got some really great news that the chemo is working and the cancer numbers are decreasing.  At least now he knows he doesn't feel crappy for nothing.

We got here super early today so we staked out our spot and I nabbed the wobbly TV tray for my office.  That Francie is dedicated.  She was late today and before she even took off her coat she came to make sure we have what we need.  Apparently today is ugly holiday sweater day.

The people here today are more chatty.  A gentleman was getting some treatment today and was talking about how sensitive he is to the cold.  My Dad said something to him about having had that before and this guy tells my dad he only has 3 or 4 months to live.  I can't even imagine.  Some of the people here today won't be around when my dad finishes his treatment a few months down the road.

There is another lady who was here last time.  Before she had this big ass suitcase, I'm talking giant, like you would take on a 2-week trip.  Last time she asked for the shuttle to come pick her up to take her over to the hospital, she didn't have enough energy to make the walk.  You all know me, while feeling really bad for this woman all I could think was "if your suitcase wasn't the size of a house, you could probably make it!".  Today she is here.  She maybe works at Taco Bell, she is wearing a Taco Bell shirt.  They have these nice recliners but she has her legs wrapped up in heating pads on a chair in front of her.  I don't know why she doesn't use the recliner, it would be much more comfy.  I could give these people some advice but with my lack of filter I'm keeping my big mouth shut.

Oh goodness, she just told the other lady that she is homeless.  She stays in a shelter or she stays at a hotel after chemo.  Not that having cancer is bad enough, she freaking has nowhere to live.  No wonder her suitcase is so large.  I want to take her home with me after listening to her talking about her circumstances.

The Fed Ex and UPS delivery guys that come here are quite handsome.

They have rabbit turd ice in the ice machine here.  Like Sonic ice.  I love that kind of ice.  Crunchy.

I did some work, now I'm back.  Dad has a harem here on aisle 2.  The newest entrant must have seen my sister's hair at some point and thought that teal would look nice with her gray hair.  She maybe should have gone to my sister's colorist.  She whipped out this GIANT needlepoint project that's on a frame.  This thing is so huge that her arms are totally extended out in front of her to work on it.  You know me and my picture taking...totally not appropriate here.  :(  This teal haired lady, she is the happiest cancer patient ever.  She's over there just smiling for no reason and she's had lots of phone calls.  Happy Happy.

Another lady just joined the harem...I'll assess the situation and report back...

Dad got a visitor and then we left so I have nothing to report on the new lady.  There was a lot more activity today and his treatments are getting shorter, but after observing some the the people today, it really makes me thankful for my health, and I even re-evaluated my crappy "I hate the holidays attitude" for a few minutes.

This new trend is flat out annoying

I've noticed lately that when I go out shopping, there is usually something in my cart that flags the cashier and they try to sell me a "service plan" or "extended warranty".

It started with the new vacuum I bought a couple of months ago.  Wal-Mart wanted to know if I wanted to buy the "whatever-it's-called" for an additional fee.  This is in case it breaks or something.  If it breaks, I'm going to take it back and ask for a replacement, why should I pay extra for that?  I thought it was weird.  I know they do it for TVs and stuff, but a vacuum?

Fast forward to last week.  Tommy's equipment bag for baseball needed to be replaced.  the zipper had broken and would no longer close.  We went to Dicks and bought a new bag, it was $25.  They asked me if I wanted to purchase the protection policy (all of the stores call it something different) for $5.  Are they joking?  It's a bag that gets thrown around the dugout, gets sunflower seeds spit onto it and holds dirty, smelly gear.  My guess is if it wears out, it is a sign that it's time for a new one.

Over the weekend I bought Tommy a Disney Infinity (video game where you have different character figures) person, it was $13.  Wal-Mart flagged it and did I want to pay $3 for the extra coverage?  REALLY?  On a plastic monster with a computer chip in it's butt?  I think not.

This is really becoming irritating.  Are we buying products that are so shoddily assembled that we now need to pay for extra insurance that the product works and lasts as long as we expect it to?  Higher ticket items like cars and appliances, sure...but NOT a video game character, or a vacuum, or a canvas bag.  I'm outraged!

What's next?  I've come up with some scenarios for you:

You buy a bottle of tequila, do you want to pay $3 extra to make sure you get really drunk?

Pay extra for a gallon of milk so that it doesn't expire before it should?

How about a surcharge on pain reliever?  If you REALLY want that pain to go away, you better pony up another few bucks!

When you get a face-lift you better buy that extended warranty in case your cheeks start to droop.

I'm boycotting all of these service plans and if my crap breaks, I'm taking it back.  End of story.  However; if I could pay a few bucks extra next time I go golfing to guarantee I shoot under 100, I'd be all for that.

Bullying

I hate that word.  It's like it is this buzzword that all kinds of behavior gets attributed to.  Even one of the housewives on Bravo claims that the other women were bullying her.  I thought of it as just a word until recently, when it really hit home.  MY home.

As many of you know, Tommy has been struggling this summer.  He has mentioned here and there about kids picking on him and I told him to deal with it, or ask for help at his summer program, also known as BASE.

About 6 weeks ago he started sleeping A LOT.  After BASE, on the weekends, in the back of the car, AT BASE, everywhere.  Tommy hasn't napped in years, yet he's sleeping 3 hours at a time.  We went to the doctor, ran a zillion blood tests, went to the neurologist, no one has a solution.  In the meantime he gets an ear infection which makes him feel worse.  He misses several days of BASE, indoor skydiving and other fun things, and he doesn't care he is missing it.  He'd rather stay home and sleep.

During this process he is still mentioning that he's getting picked on and I'm starting to pay attention.  I mention it to the BASE staff, they tell me they haven't noticed anything. 

Yesterday I dropped him off and he sat down at one of the tables and it literally broke my heart.  I have never seen my son look so sad and dejected in my life.  I step into the office to talk to yet another member of the BASE staff and let her know what's going on.  I'm not in there 5 minutes and when I walk out, Tommy is in tears.  A group of boys immediately started picking on him and being vicious to him.  The other staff member said she addressed it and they admitted it and apologized.  I. Was. Livid.

Me:  Do you boys get some kind of thrill out of picking on Tommy?
Little Bastards:  Nooooo
Me:  Would you like it if you were treated that way?
LB:  Noooooo, shaking their heads
Me:  Why do you do it then?
LB:  I don't know
Me:  Do you think your parents would be proud of the way you treat other people?
LB:  Nooooooo
Me:  Well maybe they need to find out.  I'm going to call your parents and tell them how horrible you are.

You should have seen the look on their faces as I walked out.  I took Tommy back to the doctor today because after I left him yesterday, he slept in the office for THREE hours.  The doctor thinks that the bullying is really having an effect on him, and since no one at BASE would believe him, he is internalizing it and is basically saying screw all of you, I'm going to sleep to escape this crap.  We have an appointment with a counselor tomorrow, so hopefully that will be of some help.

This afternoon I marched my ass into the BASE office and had a good talk with the director.  As I was waiting for her, she comes around the corner with the Little Bastards.  They took one look at me and they knew they were in trouble.

I told her the names of all of the boys who have been tormenting him all summer.  Two of Tommy's friends also told me that they have witnessed him being picked on, so she talked to them, and she talked to the perpetrators.  She told me it would be taken care of and that she's really upset that Tommy hates the summer program and is miserable.  I told her that it's not acceptable for Tommy to ask for help, and he gets told to deal with it himself.  How is a 9-year old supposed to deal with a gang of bullies???

She told me that she would be speaking with all of the parents of the boys involved this evening.  When I got home there was an email from her to all of the parents about bullying, that they had a big discussion with the kids today about what bullying looks like, and how important it is to talk to a teacher when they see it happening to someone.

She called me tonight and my heart literally broke.  Every single boy admitted to it, that they had been doing it all summer, for no reason, and to no one else but Tommy.  I can't even type the things they said to him, I won't be able to see through the flood of tears to finish this blog.  How can boys be SO mean for no reason?  Tommy never did anything to those boys.  In fact, two of them don't even go to our school, they were just in the program for the summer.  They said they have been mean to him since day one, without even knowing him.

After all of this, I had a long talk with Tommy and told him what happened today and that the boys would be dealt with.  The relief that washed over him was transformative.  It was like he was a different kid afterward, chattering about this and that, I couldn't believe it.  Someone FINALLY believed him and took his side and took a stand to get things fixed.  He kept saying "Tomorrow is going to be a good day, right?"  I think he's petrified that there will be repercussions from these Little Bastards.

The physical toll this has taken on him, the sleeping, and his nervous tics coming back, it's heartbreaking.  When your child says he's getting picked on, it's easy to gloss over...all kids get picked on at some point or other.  That it got this bad, and to this point, I am disappointed in myself as a parent.  I'm angry at the kids involved, I'm angry that Tommy asked for help at BASE and was ignored...and I'm really mad at the other parents for breeding and creating those Little Bastards.

Please teach your children about bullying.  Tell them that's it is never OK to treat another person badly for no reason.  Tell them to talk to an adult if someone is picking on them.  Make this a regular topic of discussion as bullying takes different forms as our kids get older. 

I've held it together most of today, but now, I am going to go have a good, long, cry.

I really need to stop trying to be things I am not

You know how the whole Boot Camp thing went.  Dismal failure.  So I am not even sure WHY I decided a few weeks ago that I was going to become a runner, but I did.

I got all my gear ready, heart rate monitor needed a new battery...check.  My shoes were trashed...check, got some new shoes for running.  Dug out my old workout shorts that were nice and long (thigh friction is brutal).  Got a SpiBelt to carry my phone and keys.  Downloaded some apps to help me on my running venture...I was ready to go.

The Couch to 5K program allegedly will get you running a 5K in 8 weeks, if you run 3 times a week.  I ran a total of 4 times.  About the second time I decided the whole idea was stupid, but I'd hang in there.  The 3rd outing I took Rhoda.  Big mistake.  Big.  She's a little slut and I almost got my arm ripped out of it's socket when she came to a dead stop in front of a stranger, flopped over onto her back and practically demanded a belly rub.  On top of that, running HURTS, and things flop around.  It's not fun and it sure as heck can't look good coming from the opposite direction. 

I am a walker, not a runner.  This is confirmed.  I actually ENJOY walking.  Rhoda enjoys walking.  Walking doesn't hurt and I can carry on a conversation whilst walking.  When I try to talk while running it sounds like I'm trying to make a 9-1-1 call, gasping for air, coughing, hacking.  So from now on, walking it is.

I also have discovered I am not a gardener.  My friend, Susan, SHE is a gardener.  She is a gardening GODDESS.  She looks at stuff and it grows.  I like to look at the results of gardening, but doing the work...that shit is hard.  Digging holes and dragging soil and dirt (and a few dead trees and such)...all very physically painful.  Princesses don't like pain, but my yard was a mess and I knew Susan could whip it into shape.  Saturday we devoted over 6 hours to the project and it's not done yet.  I'm not sure how it will be finished since I literally can't move.  My body hurts from my sunburned nose to my shredded, formerly pedicured toes.  On top of that I got a wicked "I'm dehydrated and now I have a migraine" headache. 

Our yard has never looked better, and after we dig another 39 holes to plant more stuff (Susan has such a green thumb that he stuff grows huge and she divides plants and I am the beneficiary) it'll look even better.  I just wish there were cute outfits that went along with gardening.  That might make it more tolerable, but I doubt it.

Teaching Moments

Tommy and I have been wanting to see the movie 42 about Jackie Robinson ever since we saw the previews last fall.  Tommy is really into baseball these days, so when the movie came out this past weekend, Adrian and I made plans to take him. 

I had some concerns, especially since we would be exposing him to one of the ugliest periods in American history. I read some reviews in preparation, one of which referred to language so blisteringly foul you may question whether to take your kids to see the movie, but recommended taking them anyway.

We sat down with Tommy before we went to the movie and explained racism to him.  We talked about how terrible it was (and and still is, in some areas) to treat people poorly because of the color of their skin.  We told him that back then African Americans had to use different bathrooms, and use different entrances to the ball park, just because they looked different.  We also told him there would be some awful language in the movie and that he was going to hear words he had never heard before.  We told him they started with the letter "N" and that it was completely unacceptable to ever repeat those words.  We pretty much left it at that and headed off to the movie.

What a fabulous movie.  I loved every second of the story of triumph, seeing his teammates finally accept him and stick up for him.  I found myself with a smile on my face throughout the majority of the movie and I even clapped a few times, cheering Jackie on.

Most importantly, Tommy loved the movie too--even though it wasn't animated or in 3D.  He also learned something, which was worth the price of admission, in my opinion.

Yet another example of age creeping up on me

I went to the Bob Seger concert last night with my friend Karen.  Joe Walsh was the opening act, and for a guy who is 65 years old, he rocked it.  His band was full of sound and I was really surprised at how good he was.  When I come back in my next life, I want to be his middle back up singer because she gets to stand next to a hot hunk of man named Bubba.  *swoon*

During the intermission I was looking around, because I love to people watch, and made a few observations:

• Aviator frames just aren't for sunglasses.  Or, this gal has had them since the 80's and can't let go of them.
• The most popular hair color was gray.  At least half of the men were bald, going bald, or had comb overs.  I even saw a comb forward, trust me on this one, it was not pretty.
• Women still perm the hell out of their hair.  Many of these relics from 1987 have long, permed hair, but their bangs were straight as a board.  Did we really wear our hair like that back then?
• Handicapped parking was likely at a premium.  Lots of geezers on power scooters.

It's OK for me to make fun, this is pretty much my generation, but I did wonder if I might run into some of my Mom and Dad's friends there ;)

We made some additional observations before Bob came out on stage:

• We didn't see any trashy women with their boobs hanging out of their shirts, or their asses hanging out of their shorts. 
• No visible tattoos...Karen said they probably had them, but they were the kind you get in the Navy, anchor on bicep kind of thing with that old blue ink.
• I didn't see one facial piercing or those weird stretch-your-earlobes-out thingies either.

It's like I fell into a time warp and ended back in 1985!

Bob Seger was just as good as Joe Walsh, and he's going to be 68 next month!  I kept thinking, what if he falls and breaks a hip?  What if he has a heart attack on stage?  All was well though and they put on a great show.  We were laughing at the one back up singer, she was a cross between Maude, Sharon Osborne and Caroline Manzo from RHoNJ.  They were like the Golden Girls, those back up singers!!!

His other band members were oldies too, and the drummer, I was laughing so hard at his hair.  Take a look below:

That is like an afro mullet.  I Googled him  and that curly hair is all natural, no perm:

 

What a great night, we were thoroughly entertained.  It makes me sad that groups like this won't exist in another few years, and we will be stuck with current acts like Rhianna and Maroon 5.  No thanks.  I'll take the geezers instead!

The gross thing about birthdays

I have never ever loved the concept of eating a slice of cake that someone has blown their spittle and germs all over whilst blowing out the candles.  It's really a nasty thought.  Nearly as bad as taking communion during flu season, I would imagine.

So Tommy's birthday was last weekend.  We had a cake, he blew out the candle:

Everyone ate cake, some people had two pieces (ahem, that would be me), everyone went home.  Tommy, who has been complaining of a stomach ache for weeks, had even more cake, and them promptly puked his guts out Saturday night.

Monday comes, he comes home with a stomach ache, but goes to school Tuesday because it's his ACTUAL birthday and he had taken treats for his class.  We went to dinner, he came home, and puked his guts out for the rest of the night.  I was up all night with this kid.  At one point he missed his happy meal Halloween puke bucket and got the floor.  PSA:  Nature's Miracle works on kid messes too!

I later find out that Dylan, a friend from the party, had the pukes and missed school early in the week.  Another friend, Wyatt, said it felt like a grown up punched him in the stomach.

If this isn't a case to end candle blowing and wish making on birthdays, I don't know what is. 

Boot Camp...I'm sure you are shocked, but I did go back

I survived last week.  I hobbled around like an old lady and I was REALLY happy about the handicap rail in the bathroom.  When you drink as much water as I do, you spend a lot of time in there.  Up down up down...almost like boot camp!

Thursday came around and there was no way in Hell I was going to make it.  Literally I would roll over in the night, wake up in agony, and then lay there trying to fall back asleep.  I barely made it to work...I groaned every time I got up for my desk, my coworkers were quite entertained.

It was about Saturday I could walk upright again so I started looking forward to this week and Tuesday night's boot camp.

I think several of the regulars were surprised to see me back, they probably had side bets on whether the crazy blond would ever show her red, sweaty face there again.  Ha!  Proved them wrong!  The gym was in use for something at the school so Major Pain set up stations around the place for us.

Major Pain likes things that include jumping.  Lunge jumps, squat jumps, frog jumps, star jumps, the dreaded burpee's (Bur-PEE, get it?)...a side story...

A friend of mine, who I will not name...OK I MIGHT be related to her...she can't jump on a trampoline without having to pee.  Before I ever had kids I thought it was funny and thought this was a rare occurrence.  I have since learned that it's not, but I always laughed because I didn't have a baby out of my hoo haw, the stork left mine on my doorstep.  Anyway...somehow, all this jumping around is now a problem for ME.  I asked Major Pain if he had a wife, yes he does, do you have any kids?  Do you make HER jump around like this?  Serious, this is not pretty and I actually had to make a run for the potty at one point.  Not cool.  I'll never make fun of my babies-out-of-their-hoo-haw friends again.

Because we had to keep moving around we didn't work as hard as Tuesday.  I only burned four hundred some calories, I only threw up in my mouth a little bit once, and I am not coughing out my lungs like last week.  I'm taking this as a positive sign that I just might make it to Thursday night.  I'm down 4 pounds and I'm motivated.  So...bring on the Advil, and while you are at it, throw in a box of Depends too, I'm gonna need them.

Oh, and if any of my Westminster, Northglenn, Broomfield, Thornton, Brighton friends are looking for some ass kicking, Major Pain sells a punch card and you can go when you want.  Let me know if you want to tag along sometime!

Boot Camp...or...What the F!@#$%^!!! was I thinking...

So yeah, two blogs in one day. However I wrote the Black Friday blog over the weekend and forgot to post it.  The way I figure it, I might die in the night so I had better post this now.

So, my cousin Jim's wife Tanya has this really hot brother. I've never met the brother, heck, I just met Tanya at Walmart on Black Friday, but somehow he convinced me to do this 16 day weight loss challenge which includes Boot Camp.

Here is Kody and his equally hot significant other, Nikki (never met her either).

Kind of creepy that I post a total stranger's nearly nekkid picture, but I want you to see my motivation.  OK, so I go to boot camp.  Major Pain, aka Jarred (or Jarrod, we didn't discuss the spelling of his name) starts in with all of this cardio.

Hells bells people.  I could feel all my fatty areas jiggling around, I'm floundering around gasping for breath, my face is the color of my hot pink shirt...my heart rate monitor is flashing *WARNING WARNING DIAL 911* and I'm pretty sure smoke was coming out of it.  (Disclaimer:  It DID say low battery at the beginning...but still).

I made it through about 75% of it, flopping around like a dying fish, I could taste blood in my throat, I kept drinking water which was a big mistake because then as I'm flopping and jiggling about it's sloshing all around.  I honestly thought I was going to barf.  Major Pain asked me a couple of times if I was OK...I wasn't.  I was by the back door because of course I was HOT and I thought, I could escape, I could run right on outta here if only I had my keys...

Then we start running in the hall.  Running.  I only run if there is a fire, otherwise if I need to get somewhere fast I drive.  Running is a hazard to my health.  The friction between my thighs will likely catch my undies on fire, so I avoid it whenever possible.  In addition to the running there were squats involved.  My legs felt like jello, I couldn't do it.  Major Pain took pity on me and didn't point out my weaknesses...thank you, Major Pain!

Then more floundering around, something called burpees (which kind of made me feel like I was going to pee myself)...anyway, you get the picture.  Finally it was over.  I crawled over to my stuff, glanced at my heart rate monitor and was shocked to see I had burned 600 calories.  In one hour.  Holy Meatballs, People!

On the way home I easily could have been considered a DUI candidate.  I felt like I was swerving all over the road, my legs hurt and I couldn't feel my foot on the gas pedal...pulled into the garage and GOD BLESS MY HUSBAND the smell of spaghetti was wafting out of the house and to hell with no carbs...I ate some and it was delicious.

Boot Camp is held on Tuesdays and Thursdays.  Yeah, I'll not be able to attend on Thursday (Adrian is working, yadda yadda yadda) but I just might be back next Tuesday for another round. 

PS:  Does anyone know where/how I get a new battery for my Polar Heart Rate Monitor?  If I die after these classes, I want proof of how many calories I burned before!!

Black Friday...Observations and other thoughts

Last year was the first time I did the whole Black Friday at Midnight thing.  A couple of years earlier I went to Walmart at 5AM but that was only because our furnace was out and I thought it might be warmer there than at home.  Yeah, decided never to do THAT again. 

Last year my nieces, Lexi and Ally, along with my friend Leslie, went out for Black Friday.  First we went to the movie and then to Target at midnight.  It was fun and we got stuff we needed and everyone was in good spirits--none of that pushing and shoving you see on TV.

This year I didn't have much to get, but the girls wanted to go again so we formulated a plan.  Walmart at 8pm, the Twilight movie, then the mall at midnight.  My sister, Marne, decided to go too, but only 'cuz she wanted to see the movie.  She really had no desire for the shopping.

I wish I had taken a camera to capture the look of HORROR on Marne's face at Walmart.  It was pretty crazy, crime scene tape everywhere--not because of crime, but to keep the shoppers all in line for whatever it was they were after.  You want the TV?  Go hang out on the frozen food aisle.  Oh, you want the iPad...you head over to the dog food aisle.  You get the idea.  I was after DVD's...they were in the deli by the bacon and bologna.  Ran into my cousin's wife there, I had never met her before so that was nice.  My cousin was in the TV line...

Cruised out of Walmart, went to the movie.  We were early for the movie.  I was starving.  Seriously, McDonalds would have made a fortune if they had been open.  Walked past PF Changs and Red Robin...no luck.  All closed.  We guzzled down some energy drinks and a pizza before the movie started, and then had some diet coke and popcorn.  My poor stomach.  The movie was good, glad that series is over.  On to the mall...

The line at Old Navy...OMG...I took the girls one time to Old Navy for $1 flip flops.  We waited in line so long I needed a hair cut and was a year older by the time we left.  The Black Friday line...it was WORSE.  We turned around and left.

Here is the sad part about my BF shopping.  I bought hairspray, it was half off.  I bought a new shirt, for myself, it was on sale.  I bought room deodorizer at Bath and Body, it was on sale.  I bought one small gift, otherwise everything else was stuff I would normally buy because I need it, but cheaper.  Really?  How lame is THAT?  And on top of that, there were a zillion people just hanging out, standing around.  NOT shopping.  Why were they there?  I think I saw more teenagers than anything, don't we have a curfew here?  They are just loitering around, drinking Starbucks (it was open but had a line clear out the door!!!)...so weird.

Oh, and the line for Victoria's Secret?  Horrendously long...people waiting for all eternity to buy a bra that likely cost $85.  No. Thank. You.  Hollister, or one of those teeny bopper stores, had the shirtless dudes at the entrance, but there were so many people I couldn't even get my Cougar on.

We were out of there and I was home in bed by 230.  I'll probably do it next year, if the girls are up for it.  At least I get to cross a movie off of my list each year!

Happy Thanksgiving

Apparently I have been busy because it's been a couple of months since I have updated my blog.  A lot of things have happened, some happy, some sad...

Since tomorrow is Thanksgiving I've been thinking about all I have to be thankful for.  A two of my friends have suffered the horrible loss of their husbands (and in one case, her husband and young son).  I can't imagine my life without Tommy and Adrian, so I am very thankful for them, the loves of my life. 

My heart and thoughts are with Cara and Pearl, Tami and Chloe and Ethan, Sherrill and the Rudas...family is everything and the loss of family is unfathomable.  My thoughts are with them this Thanksgiving as they gather with friend and family and remember those who are gone.

I'm also thankful for a lot of other stuff, aside from my immediate family:

The Real Housewives of Adams County, who provide tons of laughs and fun.

Susan, my fellow democrat, who drank with me on election night whilst we sweated the results.

Loud Mouth golf clothes, because they are bright and fun.

Rhoda, my snuggly little dog, who I adore.

Vodka...enough said.

Botox, so I don't look like such a people hater all of the time.

My nieces, Lexi and Ally, who allow me to know what it would be like to have daughters

Modern medicine, which helped Tommy with a small nervous tic problem, and made him a much happier child.  Man, I love that kid.

Modern medicine, which helps me with pesky problems like hormones and hot flashes and makes me a much happier mommy.

Vodka...oh yeah, I said that one already.  OK, I'll be specific...Flavored vodka...

Bacon

All of these little things get me though the rough times.  I couldn't do it without family, friends, and apparently booze and pills.

I love you all, enjoy the frenzy of Thanksgiving and Black Friday, and send out some good thoughts to my friends during this most difficult time of year.

Muah!

Another birthday...

I'm starting to enjoy birthdays again. After a rough time in my 30s, birthdays are fun again and something to celebrate.

Think about it...
At 5 you start kindergarten
You are a teenager at 13
Get your driver's license at 16
Vote at 18
Woohoo drink legally at 21
Car insurance goes down at 25--unless you are me and crash a lot and get your car stolen a couple of times

It's pretty much down hill from there. No birthday milestones, you just get older and saggier and if you are still single turning 30 is like a scarlet letter. But lots of good stuff happened in my 30's, I got married (whew) and had a baby and kind of came into my own.

When I turned 40 I embraced it. No dreading of birthdays and celebrating with friends. So tomorrow I turn another year older and have 4 days of fun and celebration planned.

Below are some pictures of birthdays past:

My original BIRTH day

 

First birthday, check out the jazzy high chair

 

Second Birthday, same jazzy high chair

 

Third birthday, that is a Lemon Torte from Vollmers, and those are my dad's sideburns. 

 

Another birthday, Raggedy Ann cake (a recurring theme)

 

Probably a Raggedy Ann cake, check out the pink clogs.  My love of clogs exists today.

 

Another Raggedy Ann cake

 

Birthday in first grade, Julie Jamison, do you see yourself?

 

Who remembers birthday parties at McDonalds, dang that was good cake

 

Hot pink leisure suit!  That's Shari Sword for those who went to Central

Another Raggedy Ann cake

 

Not a Raggedy Ann cake

 

Thank God someone stopped taking pictures of me with cake.  Or, this is the last one I could find.  Check out those blue daisy dishes!!

 

So while I am pretty sure I won't have a Raggedy Ann birthday cake tomorrow, I will have a fun filled weekend with my hubby and son, good friends and family.  Happy birthday to me!!!!